Five Trends We Wish Would Die

The DAME fashion police commits these crimes to death row

By Giselle Zado Wasfie
Published: Dec 01, 2007

Bubble Skirts
Unless you are an über-skinny model who’s long and lean, do not even attempt to go near a bubble skirt—it will explode on sight. Bubble skirts are bad, bad, bad. They look either like a skirt which is riding up your bum, like an unfinished hem or an adult diaper.

Skinny Jeans
The ‘80s called, they want their jeans back. They didn’t look good with zippers then either. Any girl with curves looks like an inverted pear in a pair of pants that cinch at the ankle. You try them on, and then you feel so bad, you don’t eat for the rest of the day! Actually, they might be perfect for dieting…

Booty Shorts
Arrrghhh! We blame Jessica Simpson for bringing back the daisy dukes in full force. Most of the girls we see wearing these are just that—teenage girls. It’s very scary, although creepy old men may disagree. They are also tacky and tasteless. Do not go there, and hide your daughters.

Wayfarers
Unlike skinny jeans, these shades do not look good on anyone. And we mean anyone.

Men in Flip-flops
Men’s toes—really? They’re usually crusty and weird. Even if he is metro and has a pedicure (buff only, no clear polish please), they just remind us of people who go to Dave Matthews concerts. Guys: yes, admittedly this is a double-standard and we realize that your feet get hot in summer too, but by putting your feet away your chances of getting laid increase 10-fold.

Giselle Zado Wasfie is the author of So Fly (St. Martin’s Press). She will be hanging onto her trusty Marc Jacobs jean jacket and stocking up on J.Crew staples (a label she recently rediscovered from her middle school days in Michigan) this fall.

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