Lexus! Stop Pulling Chanel's Hair!

If you're going to name your baby after a brand, at least make it an expensive one

By Sanjiv Bhattacharya
Published: Dec 01, 2007

Need proof that we live in shallow times? Consider this trend – the naming of babies after brands. Cleveland Evans, a psychology professor at Bellevue University in Nebraska, analyzed the names of 4 million babies born in the USA in 2000 and he found 55 Chevys, 12 Camrys and 7 Courvoisiers – and that’s just the boys. The girls included 298 Armanis, 164 Nauticas, 6 Cartiers and 29 Skyys. One imaginative parent even named her twins Camry and Lexus.

This isn’t as daftly modern as it sounds. There’s a tradition of brands becoming names. Tiffany was a store first, for example. And the most aspirational brands often began as names anyway, such as Gucci, Chanel and Armani.

But there’s a difference between aspiration and desperation. At least Gucci bespeaks elegance, style and class. Lexus has a certain polish about it. But Dodge? Celica? Those poor kids. As high-end brand names are devalued by droves of parents snapping them up like the first day at the sales, the next wave of parents are already looking down market to give their children an individual identity. The painkiller Darvon is a popular boy’s name. Maybe this drug brands thing will catch on…

Nexium, go play with Tums, there’s a good girl. And stop waving that around, Viagra, you could have an eye out!

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