Ad Nauseam

If you've ever felt like you missed a "love at first site" chance...with a circus performer...this one's for you.

By Randy Haberek
Published: Dec 07, 2007

In our continued effort to deliver our readers the colorful, the absurd, and downright shameful, DAME infiltrated the Canadian web for only the best of the worst ads out there – verbatim – we couldn’t make this sh!t up if we tried!

Actual postings on craigslist.com:

RAVE ON!
I lost my glowstick on pope's hill m4w26 - m4w - 26
Reply to: pers-393926732@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-11, 9:39PM CDT

Were you the hottie that broke a glowstick open and dumped goo on everyone except me? I said to you "I lost my glowstick, can I have you?" and you said "you can!" That was too good/nasty/sweet 2 b true because I didn't want to hook up. However, if you're out there I'd love to know where!
Location: Folk Fest Winnipeg, Manitoba
Um, yeah. Who among us wouldn’t be disappointed in not being doused by toxic liquids?

FLIGHT OF FANCY
WestJet…you were interested in my book - m4w
Reply to: pers-384583624@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-07-29, 2:04PM CDT

I was reading the new Harry Potter book on the plane and you came to ask me questions about it and even read the back cover. I wish now that I would have lent you the book, and if you still haven't bought it, I'd like to find a way to get it to you if you're still interested :)
You were a great flight attendant too by the way.
Location: Vancouver to Winnipeg
Wow! She actually read the back cover? That’s certainly an indication that she wants to sleep with you dude.

LOVES IT ROUGH?
I think your name is Sonia? - m4w - 31
Reply to: pers-383345392@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-07-27, 12:34PM MDT

I was the one pushing you out of the bar at Ranchman's last night. You asked for my # but for some reason I couldn't get it to you. I think you said you lived in Red Deer.... hope to hear from you. :-)
Location: Calgary
Well, at least he didn’t hurl her through a window.

BLOOD, SWEAT AND FEARS
Evil Dead Musical - 8pm show August 30'th - m4w - 30
Reply to: pers-413761440@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-04, 3:11PM EDT

I was in the front row Splatter Section wearing a white tshirt with a collar and a cheesy gold/brown patterned tie and I had a denim vest draped over the back of my chair. You were sitting right behind me wearing a black shirt, short dark hair. We smiled at each other on the way out...?
Location: Toronto
Not sure what evokes a more horrifying image: the “Splatter Section” or the description of this guy’s outfit.

CIRCUS ACT
Labour of love. the girl with the stilts - m4w
Reply to: pers-412787304@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-03, 12:46 PM EDT

Hey there. Got a few good pics of you. I must say you are beautiful. Asked you to marry me lol. But it was kinda hard to try and talk to you when you are that high up in the air.

I was the guy with the goatee and chin strap. White shirt and grey jeans. If you see this write to me.
Location: Toronto
Insert your own joke here.