The Wit and Wisdom of Victoria Beckham

With her scowl and weight obsession, Posh Spice has been a reliable figure of fun for the British tabloids ever since all that Girl Power nonsense. Here's why.

By Kate Torgovnick
Published: Dec 10, 2007
Photography by ©Globe Photos

"People have this impression that I’m this miserable cow who doesn’t smile. But I’m actually the opposite.”

“David is an animal in bed. Some woman in an interview the other day said, ‘Are you so thin because you shag all day?’ I said, ‘Actually yes. And I bet you would too if you was married to David Beckham.’”

“We were the ones who were always rejects.” —on meeting her fellow Spice Girls at auditions

“I suppose there is an element of me that is posh, in the sense that I like nice clothes and I’d prefer to go out to a really nice restaurant than to a club.”

“Not long after I started going out with David, my mum came up to Manchester to a match. The crowd began chanting, ‘Posh Spice takes it up the arse.’ My mum said, ‘What’s that they’re singing, Victoria?’ I said I didn’t know and could she pass me another bag of crisps.”

“We found out I was pregnant when I was on tour in America, in Brooklyn. No, we didn’t do it there. We did it in Denmark, if you really want to know.” —on naming her first son Brooklyn

Posh & Becks
“I’m in absolute and total shock. It’s clear that these people were serious and that, of course, has scared the life out of me.” - after Scotland Yard thwarted a plot to kidnap her

“I was the one in the group that never really sang on a lot of the songs. I was the boring one. Geri with the big boobs, Emma with the hair—I wasn’t the one the newspapers were writing about.”

“I know my David’s never cheated on me. I really do believe deep down that I have the most faithful husband I could hope for. We are working on things together, but our marriage is absolutely not a business arrangement.”—after reports that David Beckham had an affair with a personal assistant.

“We’re not out to be the most famous people in America."

“The policeman was gorgeous. And he loved my shoes.” —on her recent paparazzi-recorded traffic ticket

(Sources: The Guardian, Extra, W, Music Week,
Marie Claire, Parkinson, Comic Relief,
Learning To Fly (autobiography), The Advertiser)

Kate Torgovnick is Dame's editor-at-large. Her first book, CHEER!, hits bookstores on March 11th. Joyce Carol Oates calls it "a spirited, fascinating, at times disturbing and always absorbing book." Read more at Cheerthebook.com. Kate's articles have appeared in the New York Times, Newsweek, Jane and Page Six Magazine.

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